We are complex spiritual beings whom dwell in duality. We have a soul who knows who we really are and what it is we really want out of life and then we have an ego who falsely believes it knows, beyond the shadow of a doubt, who it is. The ego is generally the first to answer this question, “Oh, I am a Therapist, I went to Harvard, I graduated Sum Cum Laude, I live in Tribeca, married, two kids, etc…” On the outside (and to the ego), it may appear that you are all these things, but they are not what defines you.
Who you really are is much, much greater. If you really want to know who you are, look beyond your labels and stereotypes and ask yourself how it is you show up in life. Look at the way you react to people and situations around you. How do you function under stress? How forgiving is your heart? How deeply are you able to love? How guarded are you in your relationships? How happy can you be without a reason in the world? Souls come here to learn and everyday we grow and evolve and mend ourselves through the paths we take with others.
Don’t kid yourself. Don’t narrowly define yourself as “successful, well-educated, financially stable, etc..” Those traits are WHAT YOU ARE (or happen to be in that moment). They are not WHO YOU ARE. There is a big difference. In my line of work, I have watched many “successful, well educated, stable, ‘perfect on paper'” people do not so perfect things. Some of us make decisions for our soul’s happiness based on the ego’s needs. Have you ever left a job you were happy with so that you could go somewhere else and make more money? Have you ever loved someone so much but because of your deep-seated fear of commitment, you needed to cheat on them? Have you ever disparaged someone behind their back in hopes of getting ahead? These are ego-driven gestures and do not feed the soul which is who we truly are.
If you want to know who you really are, watch how you react to the people and situations around you. That will tell you everything you need to know about who you really are. That is where the work begins. If you are unhappy with the way you are showing up in life, recognize that who you are is a soul on a journey to know itself and its divinity. Ask yourself why you engage in certain behaviors and learn the lesson so you can move on.
A conscious soul grows through its many life experiences and continually evolves to become a better human being. An ego gets stuck in its dark patterns and continually repeats them over the years with similar relationships, jobs and situations.
Who would you say you were?
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