… it’s never about someone else.

It’s ALWAYS about YOU.

Just like happiness is not contingent on anything outside of you, it comes from within; so does anger, but we rarely understand this concept. We like to pretend that it’s everyone else’s fault that they somehow “made us angry.” Truth is, they were just triggers to bring out the anger that we already have inside of us. 

Blaming others for our apparent anger issues, is deconstructive. It is never anyone else’s fault that you cannot control your emotional state. You have a choice everyday as to whether or not you will ALLOW someone to push your buttons and make you angry. If you engage that very impulse, you have chosen to give your power over to another human being to make you angry. It is always a choice – a choice to react to that other person as if their dysfunction was yours or it is a choice to be FREE of them and their dysfunction. That choice is always yours.

Recognize that you do not have to dance with someone’s crazy. If crazy makes you angry, learn to disengage from their dance. You can still spend time with that person, you just do not need to make yourself responsible for pointing out their bad behavior. If you don’t claim it as your own, it shouldn’t have any effect over you.

Finally, don’t stay angry with people who anger you. Those people are only there to show you your own tendency towards anger. Thank them for raising the emotion in you so that now you may heal it. They are doing you a great service if you learn from your behavior. If you don’t, you will just stay angry.